Monday, April 13, 2009

Mothers' Addictions Do Impact the Children

So, this couponing thing? It's getting out of control. I'm completely and utterly addicted to free and cheap stuff. No, I'm totally freaking serious you guys, I have been known to loiter the aisles of my nearest Walgreen's and CVS and pounced on the free stuff as soon as they put it on the shelves. Every single cashier at both stores know me and my kids and I'm sure they feel sorry for my poor kids who get dragged around, when each visit consists of two, three, sometimes even six transactions.

But Little Man? He loves it. Not quite as much as me, because no one does, but he has grown to love the thrill of the hunt. While his father is out hunting turkeys (no, I'm not making this up, it's turkey hunting season here in Texas, and it does not involve shooting them in their pen like I first thought when we started dating. There are turkeys. In the wild. Who knew? Even crazier? They didn't escape from Old Macdonald's farm.), Little Man is out hunting for bargains with me. Whenever I load him and his little brother in the car for a run, I always warn him how many stores we're going to hit. I do this so that he can track how close to done we are done if he gets bored, but also, because I always promise him a treat at the end of our shopping runs, and he can keep track how close he is to chocolate.

Once we get to a store, I always tell him how many transactions we're going to need to do. For example, I'll say "we're at Walgreen's, and we'll need to go to the cash register four times."

I see some of you are confused. And there's no simple way for me to explain this to you. Except to say that Walgreen's and CVS have these items that spit out a coupon for the full value of the item when you check out. I apply that coupon to my next transaction, which is for another item that gives me another coupon for the value of that item. That way, I spend as little money as possible. It's a complicated dance, a little bit like the tango, except that it requires zero coordination, therefore way up more my alley.

Little Man now tells me when he sees the Walgreen's sign, "there's Walgreen's. Let's go in, Mama, and go to the register five times, ok?" This is his way of asking for chocolate.

Even more disturbing? He's now asked me if someday, when he gets married, I can teach his wife to shop. So that she can buy him chocolate too.

I believe that if Pavlov hadn't been around, I would have figured out his theory myself. Except in our household, coupons are what makes my child salivate.

Another example of the impact of my latest craze? Little Man has begun lining up the pillows on our bed and getting between them and the wall. He calls this his train. The other day, he asked Sweetie Pie if he'd like to ride in his train. When Sweetie Pie boarded the train, he asked Little Man where the train was going. Little Man said to him "We have to go to four stores today... First Walgreen's, then Albertson's. And at Walgreen's we have to go four times, ok?"



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Susan said...

That is too cute that Little Man is so into the CRAZY COUPONY SHOPPING that his mother is addicted to. My kids play liquor store.

Kat said...

I can get into some serious trouble at Walgreens. It's weird. That store is highly addictive. Although I don't think I'm as good at coupons as you. ;)

Haphazardkat said...

Isn't your house cubboards filled up yet?? Where are you storing all your free treasures??
and LOL @ Susans comment...liquor store *snort*!!

Burgh Baby said...

You need an intervention. BAD.

Little Lady Cakes said...

I don't know what to say, aside from how impressed I am at your dedication to coupons.

How much do you save in a year?

the planet of janet said...

bwahahahahahahahah!! you are raising him right, girl!

Loukia said...

Oh my gosh, so cute!

Kila said...

Did your DH get a turkey?

My DH and the two oldest boys are gone on a turkey hunting trip this week.

A's Mom said...

Oh, that one made me laugh! But at least you saving a ton of money.