Monday, March 09, 2009

And It's Me Again

So I'm writing this entire post from my iPhone. Which, by the way, if Sweetie Pie knew about my blog, he'd totally mock that last sentence, because he finds it hilarious that I always refer to it as my iPhone, rather than simply my phone. Which just proves how he's amused by just about anything and why we get along so well.

I'm currently on my way to New Orleans, which is sad for two reasons. First because I'm a couple of weeks late for Mardi Gras, and do you know how many beads I'd get with my giant breastfeeding boobies? I'd probably be the first person in the history of Mardi Gras to die under the crushing weight of beads. And two, because this is the first time I'm leaving Tiny Man for longer than a work day. The Man-Do-I-Ever-Miss-Them feeling is amplified that right now there's this tightening in my chest that feels a little like I'm weighed down by 10,000 pounds of beads. For two days, I won't get to hear his little piglet squeals of joy when he spots me, the dog, a speck of dust and just about everything else, because he's an indiscriminate squealer.

Little Man has been briefed as well, if not better than any of my executives, due to how hard he took my last business trip in September. I made him a makeshift calendar with three boxes and every day, he colors one in so that he'll know when I'm coming back.

Also? I have a beef to pick with talented menu writers. When you describe a chicken ciabatta sandwich like it's the second coming, ensuring that my stomach removes itself from my body, slithers to the kitchen leaving a trail of gastric acid in it's path to becoming one with that sandwich, I can't help but be disappointed when I bite into a rock-hard piece of bread with A dried out piece of chicken. I'm just sayin let's tone it down ok boys and girls?

And now my flight's been delayed. Something about a problem with the windshield. Like we need one of those. It's freaking 70 outside let's just roll down all the windows and enjoy the nice breeze. Where's the pilot from The Miracle on the Hudson? He'd totally fly our plane in as is condition.

Love,

Catwoman.

2 comments:

Nina Diane said...

sweetie pie doesn't know about your blog...huh? how do you do that? That Johnny boy is always looking over my shoulder.....hehe

the planet of janet said...

the idea that you have the patience to type out an entire post on an iphone? makes you my hero!