Wednesday, February 18, 2009


So I have to admit something to all of you. I don't like children.

I know, this is a little shocking coming from a mom of two.

But I've never really liked children. This was the reason that during my 20's, I really thought I'd probably never have kids.

Then, and I've told this story many times before, when I was barely 29, I saw a Johnson & Johnson commercial with a smiling baby splashing in a sink and I bawled my eyes out. Or my uterus made me bawl my eyes out, not sure which. I turned to Sweetie Pie, told him I wanted a baby and that was it.

Little Man came along and I loved him more than anything. I loved that baby in a primal way, where I knew that if it came to giving my life up for his, I would without a moment's hesitation. Never, ever before had I felt that way about a human being.

And now that Little Man is a child, I still love him that passionately, even on the days he irritates the crap out of me. Because even at his worse, he's one of the best things in my life.

But on Monday, I discovered that I? Still don't like children.

Little Man and I planned a play date on President's Day and had a Piggies and Paws artist come so that I could get handprints and footprints done of Tiny Man and get a couple of prints that would have both kids in them. I collect art made from my kids' prints the way some people collect Picasso's.

The playdate became like something in a movie. Screaming children everywhere. Little Man's toys being hurled around, many of them on the brink of breaking under the abuse of out-of-control children.

And glued to a wall, eyes as big as saucers, staring in shock at the unfolding scene, were Little Man and myself, Tiny Man spared from the insanity because he wisely chose to go down for his nap minutes before the madness began.

Once everyone finally left and the house was back to its state of quiet, Little Man and I picked up all of his toys. Then we hit the mall to heal our souls with a couple of Nestle Tollhouse fresh cookies from their stand.

As we watched the figure skaters on the skating rink (I know, right? At a mall! In freaking Texas!!!!) silently, Tiny Man asleep in the stroller, I said to Little Man "I'm lucky to have you and your brother. You're not normal children."

Little Man grinned at me and said "I know. And you're not a normal Mama."

Ain't that the truth.




Burgh Baby said...

Truer words have never been spoken by a short little man. ;-)

Loukia said...

Haha! So cute.

Haphazardkat said...

where the heck were the parents while the screaming kids were wrecking your house???

And? I agree with Little Man :)

Texan Mama @ Who Put Me In Charge said...

Whoa, were you at the Parks mall? That's right by me!

Those kids' parents should take better care of your house. What's their problem???

Mary said...

Is it a bad thing that my children, at 15 and 16 years old still tell me that I'm not normal? They keep coming home though!

Anonymous said...


I just started reading your blog today from Baby on Bored and I absolutely love it. The letters to your sons are so precious. In one blog, I was laughing and crying. I'm actually pregnant with twins now and I also live in Texas.

I love reading mom blogs as I get ready to embark on my mommy adventure.

Thanks for posting and I look forward to many more. I tried to email you but couldn't get the address to work.


Sherri Smetana

Rachel (Crazy-Is) said...

We used to have a mall here in Memphis that had an ice skating rink. The mall was called the Mall of Memphis. But, when the name of the mall became the Mall of Murder, yeah, it kinda closed.

random_mommy said...

You're all a bunch of nuts!! Good nuts.

A's Mom said...

That's the sweetest thing ever!

And to be honest with you... I don't really like kids either. :)

a Chris said...

Awesome. I hope my babe turns out not to be normal either, because I, too, am not crazy about normal children.

justmylife said...

It is a strange thing isn't it, to have children but to not like children....I thought I was the only one. heh!

Tiffany said...

I'm right there with you...I love my babies more than life....other kids not so much.....playdates when they are older(9 7 6)are now harder because I cant just forget and have to come up with some lie why so and so cant come with us etc.
My neighbors kid is the exception though, shes an almost 5 yr old little adult and precious. My kids are being raised to be respectful and not tear up other peoples houses....they would be in TROUBLE if they had ever done that!