Wednesday, November 07, 2007

It Has Begun

So yesterday? I had my first doctor's appointment. And I was really, really excited about it.

I thought about just sneaking off, since most people don't know about HJB, but then I figured that just because I was going to a doctor's appointment did not make it sound like I was pregnant.

I got to the doctor's office, ready to be prodded, poked and weighed. I'd even shaved my legs and my bikini line for it, which is a big deal, because I only do that for anniversaries and Sweetie Pie's birthday.

A few minutes after I sat down, the receptionist calls me over.

"Catwoman, who told you to come in today?

- Uhm... I have an appointment.

- About that, uhm, we don't have you down and the doctor can't squeeze you in.

- What? But I made the appointment on Friday!

(receptionist punches furiously into the computer to avoid pregnant woman tears)

- Uhm, it seems you have an appointment but on Tuesday, November 20th.

- The 20th? Are you sure?

(looks at screen again)

- Yes, I'm sure. And I see there that I made the appointment and now I clearly remembering speaking to you and saying Tuesday, November 20th.

- Oh, I heard you say Tuesday and then I think I stopped listening because I was so excited."

So, folks, there you have it. The length of my attention span? Has officially been reduced to one word. If you try to say anything longer than one word to me, I will forget immediately what you've said.

Since they felt sorry for me, they gave me a pregnancy-safe flu shot and weighed me, even though I argued with them that since I didn't have an appointment, there was really no need for this, plus, I had put on lipstick by that point, which I'm sure added a few pounds.

I'm officially five pounds lighter than Sweetie Pie. This means that after Thanksgiving and until next summer? I will weigh more than him. I'm pretty sure that could be grounds for murder.

Love,

Catwoman.

19 comments:

CPA Mom said...

Serious grounds. I'll defend you to my dying breath!

I'm sorry they couldnt' fit you in...did you bring up the fact that you shaved?! Unfeeling lady.

ohio blue eyes said...

one word for you then...
damn!
unneccesary trips to the gyno require french fries...go gett'em!

Kellie said...

Funny. :) :) :)

random_mommy said...

So which doc? Experience or no? Husband thinks my life is very boring, because my number one question today is "Which doc did Cat go with?" There'll be no thinking of a solution for world peace at my house.

Nina Diane said...

they felt sorry for you and gave you a shot and weighed you.....ummm, that doesn't really go together....haha!

southernmom said...

LOL! Sorry, but that's funny!
Good luck and happy pregnancy Catwoman!

Emma in Canada said...

I weigh more than William. Sigh. I used to weigh less but I gained 10lbs post Sophie and he lost 15. Bastard.

Rachel said...

Definitely grounds!! And if he is the one that mentions that you weigh more than him? I am pretty sure it's considered justifiable homicide.

AndreAnna said...

I actually did that once - showed up a week early for an appointment! Being pregnant really makes your brain turn to rice pudding.

Slick said...

I'm glad I ain't a woman....

Or wait....

Since I forget dates and stuff too, I'd probably make a pretty good one as well? At least a pregnant one.

M said...

This. sucks. poop!

You SHAVED! That is all that has to be said to convey the seriousness of this mix up!

I did this like 90 times during Lily's pregnancy. And they saw me way LESS during that time! So how I screwed up every other appointment is beyond me.

Obnoxious. You poor baby. French fries is a PERFECT plan. Come over. I have about 10 different kinds in my freezer trying to entice my son to eat. And we have loads of dipping sauces. It'll make everything alllllll better.

I'm a Mom!..? said...

Let pregnancy brain begin!!

Vanessa said...

I think you need to start secretly feeding him lard.

That Chick Over There said...

Aww. You were excited. :)

AnGlOpHiLe FoOtBaLl FaNaTiC said...

I say you spike all of SP's food with extra carbs. You sneak sugar in everything. You make him do pregnancy with you. I've heard men can end up gaining more than women sometimes. You just help it along a little. Yay for you & your pg brain. Oh, and you ignored everything post "I" right?

Loukia said...

Will this get your attention? RED CUPS ARE BACK! (At Starbucks!)

Stefanie said...

Yay! Congratulations!!! This really is the exciting part. The beginning before you have morning sickness and get huge. And, yes, lipstick does add a lot of weigh so keep your face clean.

Blue Momma said...

I try not to think about my weight, be it more, less, equal. I just pretend it is much less than what it is and leave it at that.

No one warned me about Mommy brain before I had Punkin. I just wonder if it ever ends?

jesse said...

OMG I've been gone and I come back to some majorly awesome news-CONGRATULATIONS! I'm so happy for you.