Friday, September 14, 2007

My Funny Man

Things that Little Man has done this week that have made me laughed:

1. When he looks out the window while we drive, he'll point things out to me like planes, cows and name every single car around us by its color. But he'll also regularly yell "boat!!!!" And whenever I'd look to see what he's pointing at, I wouldn't see a boat. Finally, I put together that he's pointing out really round minivans like the Nissan Quest. Which apparently, looks like a boat.

2. Whenever we pass a white pick up truck, like Sweetie Pie's, he'll shriek "Daddy's Truck!" And when we drive away from any pick up truck, he'll yell "Bye bye Daddy!", waving furiously.

3. He can say his full name now and practices saying it like his life depends on it. But if you ask him in English "What's your name?", he'll just point to his nose. Because "name" and the French word for nose sound almost identical.

4. When I'm driving, he'll suddenly say "MAMA!!!!" and when I turned around, he squished his whole face and squints, making himself look like a freak. And when I crack up, he laughs so hard that he farts.

5. He can now count to 19. And so instead of saying "1... 2... 3... GO!", he'll now count to a random number, so that you never know when the "go!" will come. Sometimes it's up to nine, then go. Sometimes the go comes after 12, or after 17. He just likes for people to be prepared.

6. He got a chicken race game for his birthday. Last night, he'd put the chickens on the coffee table, where I left them, since putting things away is against my belief system. This morning, he went to play with the race toy and he noticed the chickens were missing. He turned the game upside down and asked "where my chickens go?" I believe that if he were to be a farmer, with his disorganization level, this would be a question that would be asked daily.

7. When he sings Old Macdonald, he'll pause and ask you what animal you want Old Macdonald to have. And when you say "a cow?" or "a pig?" He sighs, rolls his eyes and says "a rooster!" Because duh! Obviously Old Macdonald doesn't have any other animal than a rooster, dumb ass.

8. When I take off Little Man's pull up, whether it's just pee or a turd that resembles something that would come out of Godzilla's behind, Little Man scrunches his face, waves his hand in front of his head and says "PEWY!!!" He also does this when he takes off his socks and brings them to me.

9. The other day, I came out of the shower and my towel fell down. When Little Man saw this he laughed and said "Mama's bebo (belly, which he calls because of a Sandra Boynton book) funny!" Which I guess my belly and ass are a little larger these days, what with me boycotting the Slim Fast shakes and getting to the point where I split my pants yesterday.

10. Yesterday, Little Man saw a peeled onion sitting on the counter and exclaimed "APPLE!!!" I told him that it was not an apple, but in fact, it was an onion. He got mad and said "I wann apple!" So who am I to deny my child the opportunity to learn that I know best? So I did it. I gave him the onion. And he put his mouth against it to take a bite, grimaced and exclaimed "oh, no!" So, because I'm the Mama, I don't get to say "I told you so", right?

Love,

Catwoman.

15 comments:

Julie said...

The boat comment cracks me up! I drive one of those Nissan Quests - I've heard it referred to as a spaceship but never a boat. God I love that kid of yours - he cracks me up! Tell him my boat is currently docked in the garage! : )

AndreAnna said...

You should have taken video of the onion bite. Would have been classic!!

ohio blue eyes said...

you nasty woman, letting your child chomp on an onion!

(*note, I just did the exact same thing 2 days ago*)

I've been trying to get TP to laugh at farts, HIGHER EDUCATION PEOPLE...

M said...

Cod how I love you people. Let me count the ways...um...just go read your entry. Got it? Yeah. That about sums it up. You and that child are my heros.

(And mmmm. I *heart* onions though taking a big happy bite outta one probably wouldn't be my top activity. You do lose a point for not grabbing the camera before giving it to him though. Bad mama!)

AnGlOpHiLe FoOtBaLl FaNaTiC said...

We love Belly Button Book, too. He laughs so hard he farts? That's funny. We also do the same thing when an escape drives by, furiously screaming at "daddy." You know what's funny? You keep saying he does all this, but I have literally never heard him utter a single syllable.

CPA Mom said...

Eeyore likes to tell me what shape her poop is - ball mommy! 3 balls! or snake mommy!

Kellie said...

The laughing so hard he farts? Cracked me up!!

We have the bebo book, too!!

That Chick Over There said...

You all slay me.

monster's momma said...

I am sooooo putting my monster into little man's daycare! (not that he wouldn't be brillant on his own!) ;)
the onion thing - you rock...but will he stil eat actual apples now?

jempress said...

waaah, too cute! i wanna see him in action - he sounds like he could make me laugh for hours. which, you must do on a daily basis

alissa said...

You make me laugh so hard that I could fart! (But rather, I just pee a little...)

Blue Momma said...

Ok, number 4 made me laugh out loud!

If I was younger and he was older and I wasn't married and he would have me - do you think I could marry Little Man? Because I love him!

Punkin' - picked a habenero and bit it. Funny, he hasn't picked anything since then.

jesse said...

I loved the laughing so hard he farts-classic.

Slick said...

Ha...Little Man sounds like he's been hangin' around with me!

Funny list!

A pig or a cow are just boring animals....

But they taste good.

Rachel said...

See, I was thinkin that LM would be sayin "where my chickens, bitch?".