Wednesday, May 23, 2007

To My Future Potential Baby:

For a long time, I couldn't imagine my family being complete without you. Then I had your big brother and we found out that my body isn't very good at having babies. And I cried, grieved for you and eventually accepted that you'd always be a figment of my imagination.

But yesterday, your Daddy and I went to see a doctor that is a specialist in high-risk pregnancies. And she was amazed by the super-duper abnormalities in my abnormal medical history. Apparently, baby, your mama is a medical wonder. The kind that gets their own Discovery Channel special like the werewolf man or the mermaid baby. Except not quite as interesting and with a lot more whining about not getting to eat sushi for nine months.

But this doctor, she told us that we have no reason not to give your brother a sibling. And so now, little baby, it looks like that we get to visit the cabbage patch and pick you and bring you home. Just like that.

And I'm excited but highly frightened. Because in some ways, my mind had accepted that you wouldn't come to be and I'd accepted that. And so now? The realization that I'll need two car seats in my back seat and will have to go through a long stretch of sleepless nights again kind of terrifies me.

The good news, baby, is that I'll get to see you a whole lot during the nine months it takes for you to be here. Because of my crappy body, I'll get to see you on the sonogram machine a lot. Which is kind of a cool bonus that comes with having organs that like to shut down just because they have to share. Do me a favor, will ya? During the sonograms, wave at the camera and give me the thumbs up to reassure me that everything's ok while you're in there.

Because Mama won't be able to smoke or drink during this entire time, which means I might have to get into cock fighting or gun range shooting to have an outlet for my anxiety and stress.

Most babies get to stay in their mama's bellies for 40 weeks. But the doctors will get you out at 38 weeks just to make sure that my body doesn't mess with you. Because my body's a really crappy landlord that doesn't like people staying until the last day of their lease.

I don't know if you even want to be part of our family anymore. And maybe that will be the biggest irony of all, that now that I've gotten the green light to have another child, I won't be able to.

But I really hope that you do choose to join the party, because your Daddy, brother and I? We're really a lot of fun. And I know that you'd expect us to say that, but really? Except for banging the TV with power tools, there's not much we won't let you do. Plus, if you happen to be a girl? You will so get some really, really rocking clothes.

So I'm going to make the leap of faith and close my eyes and hope that some time in 2008, I'll get to see your squishy pink thighs, your wobbly neck and hear your high pitched wails. Because I'm sure we can fit one more in our king-size bed.


Your future Mama.


beebop said...

well said, catwoman, well said. here's to you and the boys going down to that cabbage patch and picking out another family member!

cheers! (and I'll take over the drinking & sushi for you for the next couple of months!)

Rachel said...

Yaaaay!!!! Congratulations on the good news from the doc!!

Also, I will drink and smoke for you! I can't wait for the "I'm Pregnant!" post!

Melissa said...

Yipeee!! Great news! I was high risk both times, and even though I was scared to go for preg #2, I'm so glad I did. I got to have an u/s every week in the 1st trimester and a scheduled c-section at 38 weeks. Even with limits, it was still awesome. I knew I was doing it the right way and I don't regret it at all. I know you won't regret this! How exciting!! :)

random_mommy said...

oh so happy!

can I come to the cock fights?

Julie said...

Fabulous news! Now quick, get to that baby making! : )

Kellie said...

Awesome. Just's to a healthy pregnancy and a squishy screaming newborn in no time!! this post basically inform us that you and your Baby Daddy will be gettin' your freak on in the near future?? :)

Go. Be gone...stop reading and go make that baby already :)

Emma in Canada said...

Yay! If only it were really as easy asgoing to a patch and picking one out!

jesse said...

I'm glad to hear that you got the green light. I'll be praying for healthy pregnancy and baby. Oh how exciting, and yes the idea of sleepless nights can be very scary. Oh and you know I think going to shooting range would be fun-I might have to tag along.

That Chick Over There said...

That is so exciting!

Sam said...

Awww that was so beautiful!! I wish you all the luck in the world with number two :o)

Beccy said...

What fantastic news, I am so happy for you.