Tuesday, February 21, 2006

When Stupid Fast Food People Attack

I don't mean for this post to be bitchy or whiny, but it'll probably be both. Yesterday, I was going to pick up some stuff from these people at a storage unit (long story, but in a nutshell, this store went bankrupt, the people ran away from their creditors and I had the opportunity to buy expensive fancy-shmancy baby stuff for dirt cheap as long as I paid in cash and was willing to go to this storage unit to pick it up) and I got really hungry, because it was around lunch time. I happened to drive by one of the greatest fast food restaurants ever that you find in the South, it's called Chik-Fil-A (which is pronounced like filet, not filah like I first called it to Sweetie Pie's overwhelming amusement when I first moved here from Canada) and they have the most wonderful fried goodness called chicken strips. But what makes the fried goodness oh so good, is the wonderful dipping sauces, particularly the Buffalo sauce which I get three packets of now, but used to get five packets of during my first trimester of pregnancy when everything I ate tasted like paper unless it was spicy enough to cause other people's tongues to disintegrate.

Anyway, I placed my usual order of a 4-pack of chicken strips, value sized (so I get more of the world's yummiest waffle fries) and a Dr. Pepper to drink. When I got to the window, they handed me my order and I drove away. Once I was on the highway, I realized that I forgot to tell them that I wanted Buffalo sauce and the girl at the window didn't as me what kind of sauce I wanted. I opened my bag and wouldn't you know it, mother fucker didn't give me any dipping sauce. I mean, who eats chicken strips or nuggets without sauce? And then, I go to take a drink from my Dr. Pepper and I see that it's a clear liquid. I've been given Sprite, which is nothing but water shaken up with sugar in it, a.k.a. pure nastiness.

So of course, at this point, I'm just pissed. Now some of you would say "how come you didn't notice the drink was clear through the see-through lid when they handed it to you?" And my response tot that, as well as the sauce forgetfulness is that Sweetie Pie and I had sex twice on Sunday night and my brain short-circuited from the rarity of sex, let alone have it happen twice in one night. My body, thinking the world was ending, was unable to go to sleep for the rest of the night.

Therefore, I spent President's Day in a blur, trying to pretend I was a human and attempting to keep up with a high-energy four-month old baby.

The funniest part is that Sweetie Pie came home yesterday afternoon and said that he stopped by McDonald's and ordered a number two meal (two cheeseburgers) with no onions. When he left the restaurant and was driving away, he realized they gave him a ten-piece nugget meal, which confused him because one, who orders chicken nuggets with no onions. And two, the girl didn't give him any sauce and he was complaining to me about who the hell eats nuggets without sauce.

Unfortunately, I couldn't tell him the same thing happened to me, since I'm still supposed to be on a diet.



1 comment:

Emma in Canada said...

Excuse me, but did I not tell you I was pregnant and that you shouldn't be so bloody funny as I am about to pee my pants. Here I go thinking that I'll check out some past posts and now I have to stop as I am having a depends moment without the depends. Damn it.