Wednesday, May 25, 2005

Hello, Neurons? Please Stop the Strike, We'll Meet Your Demands

I admit that I've always been a little on the forgetful side. My grandmother always said when I was little "Catwoman just lives on her own little cloud." I'm not very observant, I tend to forget entire conversations I've had with people and I'll tell somebody the same story four times even though each time they've told me they heard it before. I also forget facts easily, remembering something about the general statistic and so making up my own so that a fact like "50 percent of women like XYZ" turns into "95 percent of all aliens like XYZ." In other words, I've kind of got the absent-minded professor thing going on already.

Now add this usual state of mind of mine the fact that pregnancy brings forgetfulness with it (as Sweetie Pie pointed out after reading it in one of his books, a pregnant woman's brain shrinks by five percent) and you've got a serious dumbing down of someone. In this case, a dumbing down of me.

Yesterday was a particularly bad day. It started out with me needing to go to my water aerobics class and realizing five minutes before it that I was going to be late for it. So I jumped into my pregnant woman swimsuit, some shorts and a t-shirt and jumped in the Jeep and began to speed down the alley. Only when I got two blocks from the community center did I realize that my class started at 10, not 9 o'clock like it was then.

So I turned around, only to do the whole thing again an hour later. Of course, I still showed up late, because I wouldn't be me if I showed up on time, you know?

Then, I had a meeting early afternoon with one of my clients. And I was finally going to tell them about my pregnancy. Well, the meeting went 45 minutes instead of the half hour I had planned, and I had a conference call planned almost right after the meeting with my client and therefore I needed to get back to the office. So I figured "screw telling my client about my condition, they've been oblivous for 5 1/2 months, what's another two weeks!" And so I left. And they don't know. Only once I was driving back, did I realize that my conference call was actually an hour after I thought it was.

And then of course, during that meeting that I cut short thinking I was late for my next appointment when I wasn't, I told my clients that I couldn't get them a draft of a document that week, since we were already Thursday. They looked at me a little disturbed and said "Uhm... Today's Tuesday." Without missing a beat I said "Oh, in that case, I can definitely get you a draft this week." I mean, it's one thing to think it's Tuesday instead of Wednesday. But to jump two days ahead in the week??? That's REALLY pushing it.

I had the best dream the other night. Sweetie Pie's cousin is pregnant too, due three months after me. Since I'm carrying the second great grandson on his side of the family, I was really worried that she'd turn around and have a girl and then get all the attention for her offspring. Yes, apparently I'm a slightly overprotective mother-to-be who will probably turn into one of those horrendous stage mothers giving tongue lashings to all of the other kids about how they're not as cute and not as talented as my child. But anyway, in my dream, Sweetie Pie's sister called me and mentioned to me that this cousin had gained 27 pounds so far in her pregnancy. And I replied "really? But she's only 2 1/2 months along! I'm 5 1/2 months pregnant and I've only gained 13 pounds!" I was very happy in my dream.

I woke up with a smile. And in a puddle of drool. But that's a whole other story for another day.

Love,

Catwoman.

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